Posts Tagged ‘school’

• Training

  Date: 2010.08.25 | Category: Flying!, work | Response: 0

  We’re entrenched in academics and its all fairly standard stuff. For the past week they’ve constantly reminded the new airmen that if they fail, they’ll RTP (return to parent). There is no reclassification and there are no second chances. We actually had an airman come talk to my class about failing – he was headed home as soon as his paperwork was processed. Home to what?

  Why wouldn’t you simply put in the required time? I’m putting my time in – the standard for me is perfection. I’m doing my damnedest but I know if I had to I’ve still got a little more in me. I’ve got 48 hours prior to my first test and I’ve got 80% of the book memorized. I think I’ll manage this test with little difficulty.

  Our training hasn’t been exactly easy – we’ve had a hard time staying awake and we’ve had a hard time staying in class as the schedule is designed. The homework, on the other hand, is a piece of cake. We’ve had an issue over the past two days that has pulled our instructor out of the class for extended periods of time. Earlier this afternoon one of our class members left. An airman decided that aircrew and subsequently the Air Force was not for him. He’ll be returning to parent as soon as the paperwork is processed. I don’t know what his reasons were but some people aren’t cut out for the military. I think that he was one of those people that simply knew that he couldn’t cut it. In the end, he saved uncle Sam a couple hundred thousand dollars by raising the white flag.

• Flashbacks

  Date: 2010.08.19 | Category: Flying!, work | Response: 0

  Yesterday evening I arrived at Lackland, the home of basic military training for the Air Force. For the next two months I’ll be in class just like every basic training graduate. It’s back to basics for me. I’m retraining into the Loadmaster career field (1A2X1).

  Simply driving around this place has brought back long dormant memories. I saw the building that I lived in when I was just a trainee, the PT grounds that we all hated, and many of the other buildings we visited. It’s simply surreal.

  I’m a day early so I’ve got some time to kill. I think I’ll be able to manage that.

  I had to walk to the ATM this morning to grab some cash. I saw rainbows (brand new trainees that haven’t been issued uniforms) being yelled at, flights practicing marching skills, flights doing group runs complete with cadence, airmen being yelled at for sheer stupidity, and the next age group of Airmen ready to be molded and developed. It’s bizarre to see it again.

  I’m really excited about school – less than 24 hours to go. I can’t wait.

• What happened?

  Date: 2010.02.01 | Category: Life as we know it | Response: 0

  Via a status update on Facebook, of all places, I learned that a friend of mine had committed suicide. I’m still struggling to understand how the kid I knew reached that point in his life.

  When I was 13 or 14 I spent many hours over at his house watching TV or playing computer games with him. His dad seemed a little off and his mom was always at work but more than anything else he seemed to just need a friend. In some ways I feel like I went to his house to play with his toys instead of trying to be his friend. I feel like I have done that at other times in my life too – looking back on that, I’m not proud of my actions. Both of us went to the same church and attended the same youth group. When I started working part time jobs I found an excuse to stop attending church.

  When I stopped attending church I didn’t see my friend outside of school after that. He was still an awkward guy that was willing to put himself on the line for friendship. He would never do anything to offend anyone and would never intentionally hurt other people. He was always kind and I don’t think he was ever in a bad mood. We spent time in different social circles – I closed him out like others had done to me. I was just as culpable as the people I despised. This is a guy you wanted for a friend – in retrospect, I wasn’t.

  When I graduated I left that town in the hope of never returning. Sure, my family is still there and I visit when I can but I grew to hate that place. That place is where I always felt awkward. That places is where I always felt like an outcast. That place is where I learned to hate the people around me because they didn’t understand. When I think about now I realize that I was the one that was closed off. I put barriers between myself and other people. Why couldn’t I have the confidence in myself that I have now?

  My friend stayed close to that town and went to college and got a degree. From what I understand he continued to stay active in his church and was liked by all. Even though I never saw him after graduation, I have no doubts that he was an outstanding guy. It’s been 10 years since I have last seen him but his death still has had a profound effect on me. Why did he take his life? What led him to that point?

  Every year I sit through 30 minutes of suicide awareness training. Suicide rate in the military is similar to that of the civilian world. Each branch of service is a little different as the demands placed upon us are not the same. We’re taught to look for signs of depression and for people that are closing themselves off from the rest of the world.

  Things to look for:

  Appearing depressed or sad most of the time.
  Talking or writing about death or suicide.
  Withdrawing from family and friends.
  Feeling hopeless.
  Feeling helpless.
  Feeling strong anger or rage.
  Feeling trapped — like there is no way out of a situation.
  Experiencing dramatic mood changes.
  Abusing drugs or alcohol.
  Exhibiting a change in personality.
  Acting impulsively.
  Losing interest in most activities.
  Experiencing a change in sleeping habits.
  Experiencing a change in eating habits.
  Losing interest in most activities.
  Performing poorly at work or in school.
  Giving away prized possessions.
  Writing a will.
  Feeling excessive guilt or shame.
  Acting recklessly.

  Many people that commit suicide will do a practice run prior to taking their lives.

  I wish I could have been there to be a friend for him as he was for me. I wish I could have known him and seen some of the signals. Distance and time, unfortunately, have separated me from this person. It has been beaten into my head that with every suicide, the people that were close to him saw the signs (in retrospect) but didn’t do anything – because they didn’t know. They didn’t know how to put the pieces together. They didn’t know to stay with that person no matter what. Never leave a person alone that is in that state.

  Suicide sucks – its a damn shame that a good guy like that took his life. There should be more people like him in the world and its a shame the world lost him.

• My uneducated view

  Date: 2009.12.23 | Category: Life as we know it, ahh the news, rants | Response: 0

  I’m 15 pages deep into Economics 201 I don’t know near enough to figure out what has and hasn’t work in our economy in the past few years. I’m sure that with one to two more years of study I still won’t know enough to figure it out. What I do know is that the “talking heads” on our 24hr news stations surely can’t grasp a problem as large as the one we face. There are simply too many variables involved. Normative economic principle (how people should behave) and positive economic principle (how people will behave) both come into play. How many people have put off spending money because of the “economy”? How many of these people are salaried and haven’t seen a drop in their income nor an increase in their cost of living? Why would they stop spending at their normal rate (unless they decide to pursue a different monetary goal)?

  Questions like these are why I love economics – huge, broad, expansive questions with long detailed answers – answers that we may not get correct. Sure, our policy makers are educated and their advisors often have PhD’s in their respective fields but the problem is simply massive. By the time we’ve collected and analyzed all of the data the situation will have surely changed.

  Look at the weather, for example, how often have we been told that that the mean temperature on our planet is rising. How much bizarre weather have we all experienced in the past few years? Isn’t it strange that Seattle had its warmest and driest summer ever but is experiencing one of its coldest winters so far? Our climate, much like the economy, is a massive system with millions of variables. To think that we can figure out what is causing it and “solve” the problem completely is ridiculous. I think that we can find solutions that will improve our situation but I doubt we can “stop” the warming like we can stop our cars in front of a stop sign. It’s simply too big. If we ALL changed – today – forever – we could start a gradual change in both the economy and in our climate. Without everyone involved its simply going to take time.

  Wait a minute? I remember a speech from our President shortly after he came into office saying that it would take some time for our economy to recover. Hmmm… good advisers? Wise choice of words? Absolutely! Recent indicators show that we are on our way out of this hole that we have dug – we’re not out of the woods yet but we’re headed into the right direction.

  Just my two cents.

• It only took me 9 years

  Date: 2009.10.04 | Category: Life as we know it | Response: 0

  For nine years I have been sporadically working on acquiring a single piece of paper. As of Thursday, I have finally earned my associates degree. While I don’t technically have the degree because they only award them twice a year and I’m in the middle of the window I still have all the required credits. I can only hope that the the remaining credits that are needed for a bachelors degree don’t take another nine years to attain.

• f(x)=-1(4x-4)^2+3

  Date: 2009.09.23 | Category: Life as we know it | Response: 0

  I’m in my final math class for my associates degree and the equation above makes perfect sense to me. As a self proclaimed hater of math I somehow enjoy knowing what that equation means. I can actually visualize the graph of that parabola. I actually enjoy this class enough that I am going to take the next one in the series. Sure, its freshman level college algebra but I understand it – and – I think I’m proud of myself.

  I’ll be done with the second math class before I deploy at the end of the year so the timing is going to work out quite well. Before I leave I’ll be sure to register for a few online classes and try and knock out as many credits as I can while I’m deployed. I should have “oodles” of free time on my hands so I might as well be productive. I doubt that I’ll move on to calculus but I know that I will take statistics. Hooray for school! Hooray for learning!

• Time to check out of the Bates Motel

  Date: 2008.07.24 | Category: I was too lazy to organize these | Response: 0

  Since I was 5 years old, I have been nothing but a student. I have known no other life. Go to school, come home, do your homework, go to bed, and do it all over again the next day. I have known the agony of tests, finals, and pop quizzes. I have thrived on new and interesting subjects. For the past 16 years, I have been required to do nothing but learn. Today that is no longer the case.

  Today is was my first day in what they like to call ” the real world”. After 7 years in elementary school, 3 years in Jr. high, 3 years  in high school, and 9 of the most ridiculous, outrageous and dramatic quarters of my life I have earned my Associates of Applied Science. I though Bates Technical College was going to be the death of me, but I have achieved a goal that i thought I never thought possible.

  Right now, I’m not really sure what to do with myself. It feels so surreal and so fake. I guess it won’t really hit me until I have worked a few months at 40hrs a week. No more cutting off early or showing up late. It’s going to be different but I am excited. I will be continuing to work at Weyerhasuer as a contractor which is an amazing opportunity, although it may not be as exciting as a full time Weyerhaeuser employee, I’ll take what I can get. At this point I’m the only one from my class with a job.

  All in all, it feels pretty good. John seems to think it’s a bigger deal than I do. He took me out for a special dinner last night to celebrate my accomplishment. He is really excited for me to start working, he keeps calling me his “Sugar Momma”. Maybe he thinks my paycheck is bigger than it is

• Down to the Wire

  Date: 2008.07.17 | Category: I was too lazy to organize these | Response: 0

  I have not posted in quite a while, for I have been wreck for the last month. I am trying to get about 3 quarters worth of stuff done in half of one. It’s been crazy. I have been spending many night with only 3 hours of sleep and a lot of time studying. It’s almost over. One week left. We’ll see if I can pull it off.

  This weekend should be fun. We are going camping with my sister and her husband, Leanne and Jeff. We are headed for the ocean, and I can’t wait. It will be nice to have a little bit of relax time but I will be taking my homework with me. Booooo school, booooo homework, HOORAY BEER! HOORAY CAMPING!!!

  Let’s see if I survive this week…..

• I Know, It's Been a While

  Date: 2008.03.09 | Category: I was too lazy to organize these | Response: 0

  I haven’t posted much in a while. I have been pretty wrapped up in other things, as of late. I’m getting down to the last bit of school and I’ve been a big ball of stress. I haven’t been working much which also adds to the stress. ( you know, no work no money) I’ m getting pretty excited because Vegas is just a few weeks away. YAY!

  Since John has been gone, I really haven’t spent time with a whole lot of people. Last weekend, though, was my dad’s 51st birthday weekend. So, my mom, dad, Leanne, Jeff Best Friend Jenni and myself did what we always do and went moonlight bowling for dollars. It was really fun. I didn’t win any dollars. That part wasn’t so fun. Then on Sunday, Leanne and I hosted a “PartyLite” candle party. John is going to KILL me when he see just how many candle and candle related things I received. I’m excited non the less.

  This weekend I managed to get some friend time in. Cassy and I have been friends since oh gosh like 5th grade but haven’t spent too much time together since high school. Friday night I took the time and went down to Lacey to visit her. It was a very fun weekend. We got some good girl time in, talking, sharing emotions, dying hair. It was a good, much needed weekend.

  I will be putting up some new pictures on my flickr for the enjoyment of others.

• He's leavin' on a jet plane…

  Date: 2008.01.01 | Category: I was too lazy to organize these | Response: 0

      Leaving him at that airport was one of the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. It’s amazing how attached you become to someone so quickly. When you spend an average of 16hrs a day with someone you seem to expect them to be around all the time. John and I have been dating for 9 months and “living” together for a while too so not having him around is the weirdest thing.

  Right now he is in a hotel room in Baltimore, waiting for his plane to take him to Germany and then to Iraq. He will be there for four months. Doesn’t really seem like a lot because well, it’s not a lot in terms of deployments. 120 days he will be in Balaad, Iraq making and sending bombs that are protecting the men on the ground. He will not leave the base and it is in a safer place so I am not too worried about his safety. I am more worried that he just isn’t here. I have no one to watch Family Guy with. No one to rub my feet when they are tired, and no one to cook me weird but yummy dishes. When he gets back we will see what we can do money wise about an apartment together. It will really depend on where I am with school and if I can get a job right out of school or not. Either way, we do plan to spend more time together when he gets back.

  I guess it’s just really going to suck not having me best friend around for a while. I will live through it I’m sure. I am planning on staying busy with school, work, the gym, and some extra book keeping for my mom. It’s going to be hard but, I think I can handle it.